I'm not entirely taking back what I said about Ok Cupid, but it did give me my first date in over a year this past weekend. Yes, the vast majority of messages are pointless, but every so often there are ones that are worth replying to.
It also turns out that playing with the site is a worthwhile and entertaining bus journey occupation. It was on my way home one afternoon that I spotted a message from 'London Guy' (an original username...) that was intelligent, amusing, referenced my profile and was worth responding to. [I'm sure my positive attitude had nothing to do with the counselling session I was returning home from.] By the time the bus reached my stop we'd agreed that meeting up was a good idea. My current attitude is that e-mailing back and forth is a waste of time and only builds up false expectations, so why not just bite the bullet and meet for coffee?
As it turned out, we were both going to be at the same Christian festival over the bank holiday and this seemed to be an even better, no pressure, environment in which to meet. I had to keep the time and location of our date secret from my friends after threats of stalking were issued, but a friendly pint in the beer tent certainly wasn't a fearsome prospect. In fact, it seemed ideal...
...until the spontaneous singing of hymns began 10 minutes after we'd sat down. Conducting a getting-to-know-you conversation while the people around you are lustily singing Tell Out My Soul is rather difficult, but we managed it. It was also slightly unfortunate that, when I checked my phone for the time 50 minutes in it turned out that a fellow camper had been trying to contact me for a while owing to emergency tent conditions. Thus the date terminated early, but with a promise of coffee in the capital at a later date. I guess that's a successful outcome.
What's also a successful outcome is that I can finally be a mature adult around Mr Long Replyer (oh yes, he's still around) and not simply ignore him. It's taken several group dinners, a week-long holiday and a weekend of camping, but we're pretty much there. He's a good guy, but soooooo not my type.
What's not been so great has been Good Male Friend's decision to join the world of online dating. His first mistake was to include me in a round-robin email asking for help describing him in 50 words for his profile. My initial reaction? Two words: thoughtless git. (I didn't send that email.) His second mistake was to decide that sending me an email via OK Cupid (once the site had matched us) would be hilarious. It wasn't. Nor was the fact that we got an 80% match - the highest of anyone I've yet found on it. Ouch.
But we move on, if not upwards. I'm still not convinced that the world of online dating is the way to go. Surely it's better to meet people in the real world and get the kick of chemistry that prompts you to want to find out more about someone? To be pursued by someone where the feeling's actually mutual? Or am I simply being a hopeless romantic?
